David Cross, Cocaine, and President Obama

From Popeater.com:

He's a comedian, so who knows if he's joking or not, but David Cross is claiming he brought cocaine to the recent White House Correspondents' Association dinner and snorted it "maybe 40 feet from" the president.

Fat Boys - Are You Ready for Freddy?

Ghostbusters A Capella

The Internet Has Embarrassed Even Itself - AccidentalDong.com

Accidental Dong is in itself a byproduct of the internet's users racing toward the bottom. I have no problem with that, as I am often in the throes of salacious commentary on the phallic nature of most things, including shadows and monuments. That's why I've included this blog, as a testament to our ever awe-inspiring innovation of the perverse. Ten years ago, I don't think the world could have imagined such a thing as Accidental Dong a possibility in the world. It seemed too crass and obvious for even the most common purveyor of, say, 'Scary Movie'. But today's climate has allowed such a thing to exist, and so I feel obliged to include it here. Enjoy.

Eddie Riggs in Metalocalypse

21 Credulity-Straining Celebrity Cameos

The AV Club just posted a list of 21+ cameos that "stretch the meaning of himself", including my personal favorite, the awe-inspiring not-Malkovich in 'Being John Malkovich'. It's a flick that most people don't like the first time through - I certainly didn't - but that grows with each uncomfortable viewing.

From The AV Club

The script calls for a fey, temperamental, self-absorbed Malkovich, and the real one complies, playing the role to the hilt; reportedly Jonze and Kaufman spent years persuading him to take the role on after he refused several times. It was well worth the effort.

The Music Industry Has Lost Its Collective Mind, Officially.

From BBC News:

A shop assistant who was told she could not sing while she stacked shelves without a performance licence has been given an apology. Sandra Burt, 56, who works at A&T Food store in Clackmannanshire, was warned she could be fined for her singing by the Performing Right Society (PRS).

However the organisation that collects royalties on behalf of the music industry has now reversed its stance. They have sent Mrs Burt a bouquet of flowers and letter of apology.

I know that this trope is overused, but I wonder what George Orwell (or Kurt Vonnegut, for that matter) would have to say about this. It's so absurd that I'm nearly - NEARLY - speechless about it. The story almost seems like something a satirist would write to make a jab at the music industry.

I would also like to take a moment to pat myself on the back. This post represents Jinx Protocol's 1000th entry. Thanks, JOAJ, for bringing that to my attention. Hooray me!

On Gaming Addiction - Kotaku.com

Stroll on over to Kotaku.com, where you can read a horror story of an article about the costs of gaming addiction.

According to Dr. Hilarie Cash, the executive director of the reSTART internet and gaming addition recovery program and co-author of the book "Video Games & Your Kids: How Parents Stay in Control," retreating inside a video game to avoid real world problems is a common cause of "video game addiction."

The article's author basically descends into an obsessive state over EverQuest - way back in the year 2000! - and loses his job and girl in the process. Altogether, it's kind of reminiscent of an episode of Intervention without the stint in rehab. I don't say that to be patronizing of gaming addiction, but I do find myself wondering when this particular issue will come to be taken seriously. Even thinking about gaming as a serious form of addiction is hard to swallow, especially for the non-gamer.

The one thing I can say, though, is that people suffering from gaming addiction can often use that experience later in life in an actual job setting (just as the blog poster did), but you don't see that very often in the realm of actual drug addiction (unless it's in the realm of prevention). You don't see heroin addicts becoming needle salesmen, for example. But I'm sure there's someone out there who is.

Ninja Gaiden Arcade?

Obviously, I don't remember the arcade version of Ninja Gaiden. Had I played it, I might have never been as big a fan of the console version as I was (and still am). I guess I'm just not into beat-em-ups in general, and with the turtle crawl that is the screen scroll in this game, I can't be blamed for that. I found this video over at Topless Robot:

Ninja Gaiden was one of the hardest games ever for the NES, what with all its regenerating goddamn birds, but it was also widely known as a great one with a badass protagonist and enemies that exploded as soon as you touched them with a sword. The arcade game plays like another game entirely; it's a beat-em-up where you fight guys in Jason masks. And how do you fight them, pray tell? Well, the best way is to do a ninja flip and throw them over your head. It's great.

Nina Gordon (Veruca Salt) Covers NWA

Here are the lyrics, in case you'd like to sing along:
Straight outta Compton crazy motherfucker named Ice Cube
From the gang called Niggaz With Attitude
When I'm called off I got a sawed off
Squeeze the trigger and bodies are hauled off
You too boy if ya fuck with me
The police are gonna hafta come and get me
Off yo ass that's how I'm goin out
For the punk motherfuckers that's showin out
Niggaz start to mumble, they wanna rumble
Mix em and cook em in a pot like gumbo
Goin off on a motherfucker like that
with a gat that's pointed at yo ass
So give it up smooth
Ain't no tellin when I'm down for a jack move
Here's a murder rap to keep you dancin
with a crime record like Charles Manson
AK-47 is the tool
Don't make me act the motherfuckin fool
Me you can go toe to toe, no maybe
I'm knockin niggaz out tha box, daily
yo weekly, monthly and yearly
until them dumb motherfuckers see clearly
that I'm down with the capital C-P-T
Boy you can't fuck with me
So when I'm in your neighborhood, you better duck
Because Ice Cube is crazy as fuck
As I leave, believe I'm stompin
but when I come back, boy, I'm comin straight outta Compton

Newest Left 4 Dead 2 Trailer

Chuck Klosterman - Eating the Dinosaur

Chuck Klosterman may just be the snarkiest human being alive, but if you enjoy his brand of irreverent, sometimes poignant humor, then you should be in for a treat.

I can't say that for sure, of course, since I haven't read the book yet myself, but if works like Killing Yourself to Live and Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs are any indication of Klosterman's ability to skewer modern pop culture, then I have no qualms in supporting it.

What Klosterman does especially well is take a given assumption - country music sucks / people hate country music - and analyze it so that he doesn't necessarily agree but finds a more prescient truth hidden in the debate. That is the brilliance in his writing. He's not just a music snob casually hurling spittle on cheap and tawdry forms of music (or at culture at large). He's often surprising in his observations, and that's what draws me into his writing every time.

Here's a blurb from Amazon:

In Eating the Dinosaur, Klosterman is more entertaining and incisive than ever. Whether he's dissecting the boredom of voyeurism, the reason why music fan's inevitably hate their favorite band's latest album, or why we love watching can't-miss superstars fail spectacularly, Klosterman remains obsessed with the relationship between expectation, reality, and living history. It's amateur anthropology for the present tense, and sometimes it's incredibly funny.

Vonnegut Reissues: Does His Work Hold Up?

From The Los Angeles Times:

Vonnegut started publishing in the early 1950s and, in 1969, came out with "Slaughterhouse-Five," recently reissued by Dial Press -- along with "Sirens of Titan," "Mother Night" and "Galapagos," all $15 -- a miracle book that both distilled everything its writer knew and caught the wave of America's damaged, deranged Vietnam-era mood. The worldwide splash made by "Slaughterhouse-Five" turned Vonnegut into a wealthy celebrity, and thereafter it came to seem that everything he'd written before had been a kind of preparation, while what he wrote after merely drifted in that book's wake. That judgment is true in a way and yet totally unfair -- a very Vonnegutian formulation -- although "Slaughterhouse-Five" does remain central.

[Paperback Writers: Slaughter and Rubble]

When Nerds Get Knives: Einstein Pumpkin

At the top here is the final product of the pumpkin art, and below is the time-lapse video of how the artist goes about making these creations. If you're intrigued at these elaborate pumpkin artworks, check out Pumpkin Gutter.

Super Mario Bros. Wedding Cake

LP, in looking for cake toppers for our wedding, brought to my attention a peculiar cake similar to the one posted here. It'll never happen for our wedding, but I can dream, can't I?

Are Video Games the New B-Movies?

From Peter Suderman (via Andrew Sullivan):

I’ve been playing a lot of Killzone 2 this week — which, by the way, I highly recommend — and, in many ways, it’s really just an interactive B-movie. The scripted bits that carry along the in-game action consist almost exclusively of tough-guy cliches pieced together from the last forty years of action movies, comic books, and war films. It’s silly, outrageous, over-the-top, and incredibly entertaining — just like a good B-movie should be.

People don't generally make out (or get it on) in the backseat of a '64 Chevy while a video game is playing out, though.

Jupiter's Moon, Europa, Has Enough Oxygen to Support Life

From PhysOrg:

New research suggests that there is plenty of oxygen available in the subsurface ocean of Europa to support oxygen-based metabolic processes for life similar to that on Earth. In fact, there may be enough oxygen to support complex, animal-like organisms with greater oxygen demands than microorganisms.

In addition, the moon's ocean contains about twice the liquid water of all the Earth’s oceans combined. New research suggests that there may be plenty of oxygen available in that ocean to support life, a hundred times more oxygen than previously estimated.

This may turn out to be an important find indeed, since it is often thought that an atmosphere conducive to life would be much farther away from us than one of Jupiter's moons. We are only in the early stages of learning about the surface of Europa, but if you're interested in the moon and its potential for life, you can check out Richard Greenberg's Unmasking Europa: the Search for Life on Jupiter's Ocean Moon.

I Wanna Hld Your Handheld, Vol 1

From 8-bit Operators:

Conceived and compiled by long-time electronic artist and 8-bit composer, Jeremy Kolosine (a.k.a. Receptors), the 8-BIT OPERATORS collective features some of the top 8-bit artists from North America, South America, Asia, and Europe, a selection of the best musical innovators, and several of the inventors themselves.

Other than being somewhat strange - the vocals make me think a ghost has invaded the computer - the album is really, very cool. Even if some of the tracks aren't very good (I'm looking at you, 'Come Together'), overall Handheld is definitely more interesting than plenty of other Beatles tribute records I've listened to in the past. I'm especially digging the 8-bit versions of 'For the Benefit of Mr. Kite!' and 'Sgt. Pepper's'.

You can stream the entire album online right now, and I think - but I'm not sure - that you can download it as well. In addition, one of the contributing bands - Anamanaguchi - has an album (and a web site!), which you can stream online or purchase on iTunes. You can go to the site to pick up the album, 'Dawn Metropolis'.

It's pretty good, if you can get into 8-bit music. And I, loyal readers, most certainly can. It sounds like the soundtrack to 'Megan Man 2' mixed with 'The Killers'.

[I Wanna Hld Your Handheld, Vol. 1]

Race With the Devil (1975)

JoBlo has put up a short feature on one of my favorite cult flicks from the 70s: Race with the Devil.

Two couples on an RV road trip head toward Aspen with visions of having the perfect vacation ... until they go ahead and witness a cult sacrifice. Now they have to outrun, and outthink, what seems to be an entire county of satanic murderers.

It's a movie that, while not very popular, would do well with a re-make. The Moviegoer has said explicitly that it would benefit from being helmed by Rob Zombie, and I'd have to say that I would agree with him. It's tawdry, and gruesome, and is filled with exploitation cliches. It'd be perfect for Zombie to do.

Disney Is Just Not That Into 'Ho White' Beer Ads

According to Slashfood (via BoingBoing), Disney has placed a gag order on ads for Australian brewery's (Jamieson) raspberry ale.

An Australian beer advertisement has reportedly ticked off Disney because it features a Snow White lookalike lying in bed blowing smoke rings with seven undressed dwarves.

['Ho White' Australian Beer Ad Angers Disney]
[Disney Gags on Ho White Beer]

Movie Posters From Ghana

From Ephemera Assemblyman (via Tor.com):

In the 1980s video cassette technology made it possible for “mobile cinema” operators in Ghana to travel from town to town and village to village creating temporary cinemas. The touring film group would create a theatre by hooking up a TV and VCR onto a portable generator and playing the films for the people to see.

In order to promote these showings, artists were hired to paint large posters of the films (usually on used canvas flour sacks). The artists were given the artistic freedom to paint the posters as they desired - often adding elements that weren’t in the actual films, or without even having seen the movies.

[Film Poster Paintings from Ghana]

Michael Myers's Many Masks

'Halloween' is a horror franchise that has experienced plenty of ups and downs. Actually, that's not true. Basically, everything from Halloween 2 (or at the very least H3) all the way to Halloween: Resurrection represents a sharp slide downward. Let me put it this way: if it were K2, I wouldn't ski it.

Things got a little better when Rob Zombie signed on to direct a re-make. It was supposed to be a one-off movie, a sleazy piece of artwork lightly tracing over the original. Which was fine, and Zombie did a wonderful job with it. Sadly, ending the first re-make with a certain kind of headshot could not kill the limping juggernaut franchise, and an unfortunate sequel was made, with a third on the way (not directed by Zombie).

But this isn't about the 'Halloween' franchise (even though I nearly slipped off into a rant about it). This is about the masks worn by its irrepressible *protagonist, Michael Myers. Head over to Freddy in Space to view a collection of the worst versions of the Shatner mask ever designed. You'll be surprised at how inept mask designers can be. Walter Matthau eyebrows, really? Really?

Fearnet DVD Bodybags

Over at Best Buy, the Fearnet "body bag" versions of popular horror movies are on sale. You can buy one for $8.99 or two for $15. It's totally worth it if you don't have movies like: House of 1000 Corpses, Fido, The Devil's Rejects, High Tension (which I might actually have to pick up), Beyond Re-Animator, or Ju-On 2 (well, they're not all winners).

Steampunk is Taking over Oxford

TOR.com:

See some of the best that the world of steampunk art has to offer, housed in the beautiful Ashmolean Building. This historic event was devised by its curator, one of the world’s greatest artists in his own right, Art Donovan, whose wonder and talent can be seen in this very show.

[Steampunk has taken over Oxford]

Epic Mickey - It's About Time

According to Destructoid:

The game's plot revolves around "forgotten" Disney characters. Obscure characters from long-forgotten cartoons and rides have been cast into a dark world of broken-down machinery and very bitter attitudes.

Jiminy Crickets, guys. That could be a beast of a game, if the cover of 'Game Informer' is any indication (and it most certainly is not).