Now My GRE Scores Are Official

A lot has been going on in the Olde Lifee lately, and I'm proud to admit that I was wrong about my GRE Scores. I must have been so damn excited to have broken the 1000 mark that I didn't realize that it was my Verbal Score which was a 610. The math score was a 570. 1180 still. No change there. But I did better on the verbal than first thought, so I'm excited.

Also, I found a video I think everyone should watch. It involves a lion and a person and NO violence. Hurray! No, it's cool. If you've never seen a lion hug a person before, here's your chance. Visit the link below:

http://www.telestereo.com/Archivos/video.html

I've finished the first big edit of my third novel, 'The Marquis Man.' I cut nearly 20,000 words from it. The book went from about 125,000 words to 105,000. Not a bad edit. Plus, I'm in the process of changing the name of the book from 'Marquis Man' to something else. Some of the names I've been tossing around are:

'Out in the City'
'Down and Out in the City'

And so on. You can see a theme there. I'm just in the brainstorming phase right now, so don't boo the names too badly just yet. Have a good afternoon. Let me know if you saw the lunar eclipse last night and if you were impressed. Toodles.

Happy VD

Here's a little story I heard that will spice up your Valentine's Day:

A woman in Germany sold sex on the internet as an auction to the highest bidder. A pretty abstract thing to sell, but whatever works.

Well, when the online auction was over, six men tied for the highest bid. So what did this prosperous young woman do? She decided to have sex with all six of them!

Well, you probably can guess what happened next, but if you can't, I'll tell you. She got pregnant and sued to auction company for a paternity test. But since the men involved signed anonymity agreements, the company refused to release the names.

She eventually won the court case and now the men have to handle over DNA to prove who is the father. Hmm. That's got to be the worst value on the internet. First of all, you have to share your prize with five other guys - I wonder if the sixth guy got a discount - and then you get the girl pregnant!?!

Happy Valentine's Day!

'Friday Night Lights' May Have A New Home

According to The Hollywood Insider, the unsure future of the critically-adored show 'Friday Night Lights' still looks as tumultuous as ever.

HOWEVER,

unlike other similar situations in years' past (Arrested Development, anyone?), NBC has the foresight to know that it might be better to move the show to another network or station rather than close down production outright.

Keep your fingers crossed.

***

And, speaking of Arrested Development, there's yet more evidence that an AD movie is in the works. Purportedly, Jeffrey Tambor and Jason Bateman have been contacted regarding a possible theatrical release.

Ricky Gervais, Jonah Hill, Louis CK in This Side of the Truth

Rotten Tomatoes is reporting that Ricky Gervais is set to direct his first feature, This Side of the Truth, starring himself as the protagonist and Jonah Hill and Louis CK as his erstwhile supporting cast. No other real news on that yet.

GRE Results

Okay, you can give the edge of your seat a rest...for now. I took the GRE on Monday, and, as far as I can tell, I rocked it.

Well, I say that, but my being satisfied doesn't necessarily mean that I knocked the thing off its ass. 1180. 570 Verbal. 610 Quantitative. 1180 isn't Einstein, but it's at least, I don't know, Jerry Bruckheimer or Michael Bay's intelligence level, right? And they're pretty f*cking smart.

The writing scores still have to come back, but if I don't pass those, I might as well give up on the idea of graduate school all together.

'Super' Tuesday

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
~George Carlin

I think in the deepest part of me that I am at least a marginally optimistic person. However much I'd like to convince myself of such a fact, I can only find that the idea of 'Change' in an election in 2008 is a stupid, silly fucking idea. To be a contender in the election, one must inherently be a part of the system.

So doesn't that bring into question the Democratic candidates' platforms? Eight years ago, Bush 43 (even though he wasn't quite Bush 43 quite yet) ran on the whole 'Washington Outsider' thing. Remember that? He was such an outsider, he didn't have a goddamned clue what he was doing.

Now, once Obama or Hillary gets chosen for the nomination, I hope that this whole idea of change goes away, unless one of them plans on going into Congress with a machine gun and armed mercenaries. Now THAT would make for an interesting election.

I'm almost positive that Hillary wouldn't do such a thing, because she likes being privy to the power of governmental function. I'm sure that a lot of crusty white people may think that Obama would, though. Which is one reason why I'm sort of leaning toward the left this time around (as opposed to last time, which was to vote for ANYONE but George W. Bush). What srikes fear in the hearts of Republicans the most, a black guy or a woman (who's also a Clinton!)?

Of course, I'm only kidding, sort of. But when or if you go into the booth today, don't fool yourself. We're all stomping on the same bag of dog shit, hoping to put the fire out. I don't even know what that means, but I liked the sound of it, so it's going into this post.

The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”
~George Carlin

Help Stop Hunger! Be Smart!

If you go to FreeRice.com you can take an online vocabulary quiz. For every answer you get right, 10 grains of rice are donated to the United Nations World Food Program.

It's a good cause. So if you're smart, or think you are, then use your time-wasting skills to help those less fortunate than yourself. I would say you don't even have to think about it, but since it's vocab, you probably will.

Wii Will Get Rock Band!

I just found This Article this morning, and even though there's no release date or details, Wii will get Rock Band. Woo-Hoo!

John Edwards Is Out (Of the Presidential Race)

Oh well. That's one more out.

I guess it's down to Clinton and Obama. Oh, and Hillary.

Jerry O'Connell Does a Dead-On (sort of) Tom Cruise

BumWine.Com - For The Men Who (Don't) Have Everything

I can already hear the groans from the PC faction of my fanbase, but since it has been brought to my attention, I have a journalistic obligation to bring BumWine.com to your attention.

Don't I? Well, if you've ever wondered which of the bum wines has the worst taste, then you can find out.

What constitutes a 'Bum Wine'? Cheaply priced and produced alcoholic beverage with as high an alcohol content as possible.

Night Train (Yep! Like the G'N'R song!), MD 20/20, Wild Irish Rose. Those are all bum wines. If you find yourself drinking one of these, put down the bottle and make sure that you have a residence. Please.

Election 2008: A Real (Cynical) Perspective

Rolling Stone correspondent Matt Taibbi has done some amazing, insightful work on the campaign trail, and its not skewed to benefit Democrats and its not the sort of ego masturbation that seems to go on in the mainstream media.

After reading the newest Taibbi article in my Rolling Stone, I tried to move over to Time and read something about John McCain and was so appalingly let-down that I could barely finish it.

I guess I'm really looking for something that reads between the lines and doesn't spout the unpalatable rhetoric which has dominated the contest so far. Blech. The last thing I need to hear about is more 'Change' nonsense. It's denigrating your intelligence to experience more of the same nothing that we get from our news sources.

To read some of Taibbi's writing, click here.

Even MORE Scientology Bunk

If you're as enthralled with learing about Scientology as I am, then you should check out this link, composed by a former Scientologist.

It's more technical than the other critiques (Read: South Park) you've seen online. The optimum tactic is brainwashing through repetition, ostensibly, and the author sheds light on Auditing, the ever-pervasive information collection technique of the 'Church'.

You can find passages like the following on the link:

In the south park episode "trapped in the closet" [comedycentral.com], they did a cartoon version of the OT3 materials labeled "This Is what Scientologists Actually Believe", if Matt and Trey has been members of the church, they would have been ex-communicated very quickly. The church would have almost definitely told Issac Hayes to "dissconnect" from them or otherwise become ineligible for any future Scientology services or auditing.

I rest my case.

Kwanzoo - Stupid Name, Smart Trivia

I've been addicted to Kwanzoo.com, a movie/tv trivia site. Some of the question, you can tell, have been composed by 14-year-olds, but the others are valid and entertaining. It'd be good to play a drinking game while checking out this site.

Everbody's Gone Get A Check

I will count this post as my weekly/monthly/yearly economic update. The economy is going into the tank, so the Federal Government thinks giving everybody at least 300 bucks is going to solve our problems.

It probably won't, but I find myself thinking that I could really use the money. This is where my principles and my pragmatism fall into conflict. 300 dollars could help me out in a lot of ways, and not just for the giant tub of mayonnaise I've had my eye on at Wal-Mart.

My mantra of 2008 is debt-reduction. Maybe the FedGov could adopt it, too.

Paul Thomas Anderson: A Horror Movie?

PTA's next movie may be a horror flick. No information as of yet, but you can read the non-story over at Bloody Disgusting.

Watch the new AVGN Video: Rambo

The new Angry Video Game Nerd Video is available at Gametrailers.com. It's about a historically horrible game, Rambo. Stop it. I can hear you seething.

http://www.gametrailers.com/player/29877.html

Amy Winehouse Caught Smoking Crack (Insert Some Cheap Joke About Rehab)!!!

I know that she is so far beyond help now, but Amy Winehouse was caught on tape smoking crack. It's just interesting enough for me to put on the Olde Blogge here, though.



I've had trouble with links and vids lately, so I'll post the link to the video in addition to the video above. You can catch the "singer" lighting up at about 1:30 into this strange little two minute journey.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2493561172073804577&q=
amy+winehouse+crack&total=112&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=1

More Scientology Bunk

I know that I went on a pretty anti-Scientology crusade for awhile, but there was so much to battle that I got tired of holding the sword. Sexual innuendo aside, you can find a juicy Propaganda Tape right here, courtesy of Gawker.com.

The plot thickens...and you'll have to watch the video before the LOX (Lawyers of Xenu) file some sort of lawsuit or complaint or whatever. Plus, it has Kirstie Alley!

Heath Ledger Found Dead in NYC Apartment

First, Brad Renfro. Now, Heath Ledger. 25 and 28 years old, respectively. Both dead. It's odd.

Speculation is that Heath Ledger died of either an accidental overdose or a suicide. Pills were found all around him in his apartment in New York City.

I've got to be perfectly honest in saying that, for the longest time, I didn't really like Heath Ledger as an actor. I hope that's an okay thing for me to say in lieu of his death.

But I didn't. I never cared for 'A Knight's Tale' or 'The Patriot.' '10 Things I Hate About You' didn't exactly thrill me.

And yet I grew to respect him as an actor, especially after 'Brokeback Mountain.' I'm looking forward to seeing him as The Joker in 'The Dark Knight', the sequel to Christopher Nolan's 'Batman Begins'. He was a good actor and perhaps a troubled man.

I hate to take a swipe at Britney Spears here, but it does seem that maybe the coverage of her trainwreck of a life may prevent other stars from coming forward with news of their own addictions and personal problems.

The line between a respectful sort of personal trouble and a public circus is often hard to decipher, especially with the unabashed and hysterical media we have in this country. In all of this, I certainly hope that it wasn't our patronizing view of young starlets which may have prevented Heath Ledger from getting help.

50 Pages into the Fifth Novel, and it's a Drag.

My newest book is a pulpy sort of first person crime novel - no horror in it (frown) - tentatively titled One Last Drag. It's set in my fictional Athens-y town of Pine Hollow, and the bodies are starting to pile up. It's awesome!

My GRE Practice Test

Last night I downloaded the free software from the GRE Testing Site and took my first practice test.

I've got to say that I didn't do as poorly as I thought I would. 560 Verbal and 600 Math. 1160 Total. I'm hoping that, over the next two weeks I can study well enough to get the verbal score up another forty points or so, but it's REALLY difficult to get a 600 on the verbal. Or so I hear.

Be FilmWise: Visit Filmwise.com

If you think you know more about movies than anyone else, here's a good way to test your knowledge. Go to FilmWise and take a few of their movie quizzes. They're great time-wasters, and they're pretty effing tricky, if you don't know your stuf.

They have text (traditional) quizzes and visual tests. The Invisible Tests are a favorite of mine. But they also have a quiz called You Make Me Sick, which chronicles the best in movie regurgitation. Don't think that knowing the Exorcist had puke in it will get you a good score; some of them are fairly difficult to pick out.

Headline: Best bowl impression has Georgia looking like 2008's top Dawg

Dennis Dodd, some form of a sports guy, I suppose, has Georgia no. 1 for next season. I'll have to sound like a Homer and say that they should have this year. But I digress.

I don't know the guy, but I can see when a guy can see talent. He's dead on with the Dawgs as the Numero Uno team in the nation, but you can never underestimate UGA's ability to crumble under pressure. Let's hope that doesn't happen this year and the Dawgs can maintain throughout the whole season.

You can read the blog entry here.

Sample Quote:

Last time we checked Colt Brennan had dropped a couple of rounds in the draft after facing Georgia's NFL-like defense in the Sugar Bowl.

http://cbs.sportsline.com/collegefootball/story/10578831/rss

Diagramming the Preamble to the Constitution

On Boingboing.net, I found this nifty little link, in which a guy diagrammed the Preamble to the Constitution. I never realized how convoluted that sentence really is.

http://www.boingboing.net/2008/01/17/diagramming-the-prea.html