The Primaries in Georgia

I'm from Georgia, so I'm mildly interested in the gubernatorial primaries going on today. Everyone's focused on Roy Barnes, the guv who was ousted in 2002 because he went out of his way to be shitty to the people who voted him in.

But I'm not overly concerned with Barnes at the moment, because all of the vitriol is on the side of the Republicans, and elections are always more interesting when they're like reality TV. Right now, the Repubs are engaged in a battle to see who can reach the bottom of the ideological cesspool most quickly.

And yet, it's still all of the same old, tired, right-wing douchebaggery. Abortion rights, immigration, and taxes. That's it, folks. If you want to see anything of any real importance to the country at large, look elsewhere, because in the heat of election season, anything but real issues will be discussed.

However, what is impressive is the level to which the Republican candidates are flinging acid at these hot-button causes. It's like they're involved in a rap battle with pro-choice and pro-immigration people, even though Dems in the state are fairly conservative themselves on these issues. It's an interesting form of pseudo-conservative cannibalism going on at the highest level of Georgia's government.

The other night at the gubernatorial debates, the Rs all fought for who could win the right to be called the most xenophobic candidate in the country. John Oxendine said he'd sue the federal government about illegal blah blah blah. Ray McBerry proposed that local sheriffs should round up illegals and bus them to the steps of the White House. What this has to do with solving the problem, I don't know, but it seems like an awfully expensive process for a bunch who value monetary restraint. Of course that's a pot-shot, though. The Republican party hasn't cared about conservatism, really, in decades.

The night's winner, hands-down, is Eric Johnson. He said (no shit), "If we have to set up a Guantanamo Bay of Georgia, I would do it." Wow. I'm not surprised in the least bit, but you've got to admit that threatening to hold illegal immigrants without trying or deporting them is some pretty harsh rhetoric. What's surprising is that he's only running at a measly third in the most recent polls.

Wait, hold on. Maybe I'm way off on this, because didn't Roy Barnes - a Democrat - recently say he would support an Arizona-type immigration law for Georgia? Not only would he try to pass a law like that, but he says he doesn't believe it's a state issue, so he'd expect the federal government to pay for it! It'll be interesting just to what level the immigration debate will stoop if these two assclowns get the nomination (which won't happen, because Eric Johnson doesn't have a chance in Hell). Oh, do I pick the extreme right-wing idiot, or the Republican? I don't know.

This is obviously simple campaign rhetoric at its worst, but you cannot tell me there's a shred of difference between Roy Barnes and his right-wing counterparts (except for his shameless teacher-courting offensive, of course). And, despite the fact that there are more Democratic candidates - I will not dare call them left-leaning - it all seems like an inevitability that Barnes will secure the Democratic nomination. He's so far ahead in the polls that I was hoping the people opposing him might slip up and say something left-of-center, for once. Shame on me for my naivete.

It should be noted that Karen Handel has been softly endorsed by Sarah Palin, so naturally she has vaulted ahead of former leader John Oxendine. More on her later.