[No Subject] - Advertising Is Way Out of Hand

Right now, my 70+ lb. German Shepherd is getting her ass kicked by a ten pound cat. What is the world coming to? Seriously, Ona, show us your heritage. It's proud!

(By the way, she's the big white one in the tub)

Anyway, back to subjects with substance. You know, I get so sick and tired of advertising. Seriously. It's everywhere, man. I feel bombarded by it on a daily basis, and there's not a spot in the world that won't be sponsored someday in the future.

Isn't that a scary thought?

This is the Kotex Field of Cowshit in Butte, Montana. Or the Budweiser Electric Chair in EverypartofTexasever, Texas.

And so on and so forth. I wish I could satirize it, but alas I'm not a satirist...yet.

I am angry, however, and that makes for a good read, doesn't it? Advertising sucks. Especially when I'm trying to watch a movie and everything is pushed so nonchalantly, as if to say, "Oh we didn't mean to have this certain goddamn soda can in the middle of the frame."

If you don't think so, remember the movie Spider-Man. When he's in his room and trying to figure out how to be a web-slinger. He tries to pull what from the counter? A Dr. Pepper can.

If you don't believe it's the truth, check out the tie-ins for the movie. Hmmm. Dr. Pep-per. Interesting.

I know I know. It's not that important. But it is. Just think: there are guys out there literally trying to figure out ways to put advertising in every single spot on the earth. And I'm not even joking. The other day at the mall, there was advertising on the f**king elevator. I wish it were just a sci-fi story, but it's the truth.

And it sucks.

The reason I'm spewing venom - not Venom (ha!) - about this is the recent movie, Transformers. Let me qualify what I'm saying by admitting that I did like the movie. A lot. So that's not the problem.

Actually...there is no problem. So what if there was a lot of GM advertisement in the movie? Huh? Wasn't the whole cartoon series one thirty-minute-long goddamned commercial? Isn't that why they killed off Optimus Prime in the original cartoon movie and made me so cynical today? It's a vicious cycle. They killed off Prime to make up new action figures to take his place.

But they can't. They can't replace Optimus Prime. And I spent so much of my childhood wondering why the Goodest of Good Guys - hey, I was six - could get taken away from me in the first ten minutes of the movie, only to never be brought back.

Advertising. Adver-f**king-tising is to blame. It's why I'm the neurotic prick that I am today. Just remember that when you get tired of it too. And it will happen. Oh yes. It will happen.

I Know You Missed Me

Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to the Blog, but I just haven't had the TIME!!!! The world is speeding up, and I've got to run just to keep up. The house is a mess, and for once it's not because I'm just too lazy to clean it. I'm gearing up to move, and books and DVDs and boxes of this and that are strewn about, and it's driving me crazy. I don't move for another few weeks, but I can't help but start the process. Every time before now, I've been caught at the last minute trying to move stuff, and it becomes a bungled mess.

The above picture is me. Gross, huh? No, that's not one of my better pics, but it's one of the newer ones. It was taken, not during a cooking competition, but during one of my last bits of beer-making. The brew is done, and it is NOT fantastic! No, it's pretty good, but I think I may have done something slightly wrong, because it has no aftertaste whatsoever. Which is good, I guess, if you don't like beer. Isn't the aftertaste what most people despise?

Also, I guess I should follow-up on the Wii-Talk. Yes, I did get the Wii. I had a lost weekend. I did nothing but play video games, and it was AWESOME! We called it Party Wii-kend - get it - and we drank lots of beer, ate lots of pizza, and played many many hours of Wii. I've already used up the batteries in one of the controllers.

One of the best things about the Wii is that you can download old NES and SNES games and play them. It's great. I no longer have to drudge out my old NES when I want to play Castlevania; I can just play it on my Wii! The only problem is that there are only a few REALLY GREAT games right now. Most of them are ehhh, just all right games. Which is okay. But I'm waiting for Super Mario Bros. 3 to be released. Boy, that brings back memories.

Check out the slideshow of our last beer-making expo. It is below, and it is glorious.